Purgatory

When Renolds asked what I did that day as we settled back into her cluttered apartment , I bit my lip and suppressed answering with “Astrid”.

“Nothing,” I said slyly. It was partially true, anyways. Keyword: partially.

“Jolly good. Now, how do you feel about penis?”

“Uh… what?”

“I know. It’s a scary thing, but your bicurious adventure has been fairly monotonous. What kind of tour guide to sexuality would I be if I didn’t show you everything?”

“The kind I’d like…”

“You can’t pick out a dress without seeing all the stores first.”

“Many people do,” I pointed out.

“Well not my followers. So, we are going clubbing tonight.”

“Great… I can already smell the liquor…”

“Don’t make that face at me, Flo! You need this. Trust me. Aren’t I your lesbian goddess or something?” The Bitch smirked.

“You’re lucky I don’t have means to leave,” I play threatened.

“What would you leave me for? And where would you go?”

“I…” I didn’t know. There wasn’t a home to go back to; that was merely a house with parents. My friends weren’t really friends. There was Lika, but I kissed and ditched her so that wasn’t an option. I didn’t know any of Renolds’ friends well enough. There was Astrid but our relationship was shaky and unsure.

All I had was Renolds.

Despite residing in a purgatory between home and hell, I was surprisingly at ease.

“I don’t know,” I finally said.

“And that’s why I’m here,” for the first time since I met, Renolds, she was serious. She rested a cool hand on mine and smiled weakly.

“It’s early. Let’s take a walk.” Pulling me off the couch, I watched her eyes flicker. Something dark was immersed in the green of her eyes. A secret. A past.

I followed, transfixed by the Renolds I hadn’t yet gotten to know.

'See You Later's

Tedd didn’t even flinch when he walked in. That made me incredibly nervous and self conscious. You see, I was pinned under his sister with only a bra on and her entire top was bare. Was it normal for him to walk into a scene like that? Was she a slut? And what the hell was I doing? How long had I even known Astrid? A few days...Then again, Renolds would be proud.

“I should probably get you back to Renolds,” I heard him say. I hoped he was averting his eyes… but I couldn’t see him past Astrid.

“That was…awkward,” I said when he closed the door. I rolled out from under Astrid and began regaining myself.

“We’ve had our fair share of awkward moments.”

“So he always walks in on you and another girl?” I half joked. The other half was fairly concerned.

“Can’t say that’s happened before. But when you’ve walked in on your brother in the middle of it with some other guy, he owes you an awkward moment.”

I sighed but found a worrisome lump stuck in my throat. There was another looming question. “So…”

“So…”

We stood at opposite ends of the bed, clothed, and fairly composed. The only sign of our afternoon was our disheveled hair.

“Is this it?” I asked.

Astrid snorted. “What, are you going away? Or sending me away?

“Yeah,” I smirked, “to Iceland. The box is postmarked and ready to go.”

“Aren’t I at least worth a flight?” she laughed a bouncing laugh, making me smile. “But honestly, you’ve been here, what? A week? And I’ve ran into you a multitude of times. We’ll see each other again.”

“But…”

“Look, you seem to be one of the few people who has a mind and a voice in this world. You intrigue me. And I know I intrigue you. I see the way you watch me. So, no, it’s not it. We’ll see each other again. Maybe we’ll do this again. We’re going to be friends at the least. And I’ll send you a post card from Iceland. Okay?”

“Okay…” I was hesitant. If we left our afternoon here, nothing could be made out of it. Which I wanted… or didn’t… God… I didn’t know.

I looked up from my pensive state to find her standing beside me, “Don’t worry kid,” she placed a hand on my cheek.

My heart flipped, my stomach turned. Goddamn it, Astrid. “I should go…”

“You should,” she said while her eyes screamed “stay here”. I turned away and left before I didn’t have the strength to do so.

“I’ll see you,” I said.

“You sure as hell will,” arms wrapped around my middle and a kiss was placed on my cheek. I was pushed out the door and on my way back to Renolds before I could comprehend what happened. 

Clarity

We were laying on her black comforter in her bed. I couldn’t help but be uncomfortably aware that she slept there. Every night (hopefully alone so I could change that).

The room smelled like her: fresh, slightly flowery, mostly clean and pure.

A movie I never saw played on the T.V. but I wasn’t watching. How could I watch a movie when Astrid was lying next to me?

Her hand was painfully close to my thigh; I could feel the heat from her fingers but not the weight of her palm. Her head was resting on my shoulder; her breath grazing my ear, driving me crazy. Her feet were brushing mine. She was so close… but not close enough.

“This movie is perfect. You can’t help but smile because of it,” she said.

I nodded. I was sure it was perfect and smile inducing, but I couldn’t focus. I felt Astrid’s eyes studying me so I looked at her.

There was a pause. The world stopped for a second. Nothing moved, no one breathed. The world didn’t turn. The oceans didn’t wave. No one said a word.

She leaned in, and she kissed me. It was soft and simple. A friendly peck. But it was a kiss.

My arms needed to wrap around her. My legs had to be tangled in hers. My lips required hers back on mine. She was suddenly my life support.

Yet, I didn’t crane my neck for more. I didn’t try to drape myself with her. I only looked at Astrid, neither of us moving.

“You’re allowed to kiss me again,” she said. It amazed me that she could find words in a moment like that.

Somehow, we ended up kissing. Our lips were pasted together. Our legs were intertwined. Our arms were enclosed with each other. We were a knot, tied together. Nothing was ever clearer than in those long kisses.

***Author's Note***

Sorry for the brief delay in the story for shameless self promotion but.. I've entered a scholarship contest with one of my stories and it would be lovely of you all to vote for my entry. Voting is until May 16th. Ten votes a day, everyday can be submitted. So support a budding author so she can get scholarship money, go to college, and become a real author...Please! It'd be much appreciated.
http://createrealimpact.com/view/8886
Here is a link to my entry. If you find any problems, just let me know or go to the website (Createrealimpact.com) and find a writing piece called The Incident. I appreciate any votes!
The Bicurious Times of Florence Lee will resume with a new post in the next few days.
Thank you
~aerie